Monday, May 1, 2006

Farewell Fashion Week, hello Bananas in Pyjamas

And so it was that the last designer collection of the last show of the last Mercedes Australian Fashion Week came to pass. But no it's not the last Fashion Week to be staged in Sydney. The event will just have a different name as of next season, under a new title sponsor, which is TBC by the event's new owner IMG.

It wasn't the drag queens in the opposite front row which proved the week's biggest revelation. Nor the promo postcard placed on chairs by one of the group New Generation show brands on display last night - a postcard of the iconic, bug-eyed, turnip-faced, 70s re-edition doll Blythe.

"Look, it's Lily Cole," quipped one IMG-ite while pointing to the postcard.

Nor was it the fact that although Tanya G wasn't in this particular show, she appears to have inadvertently influenced a swag of Australian catwalkers, several of whom seem to have suddenly taken to throwing a dramatic, Flamenco-like arched pose at the end of runway before the photographers' pit. I hope no one throws their back out.

And it wasn't Sydney brand Illionaire that was being paraded in front of us either - although its colourful streetwear did prove something of a mini-revelation at the event.

No, it was something said by Lorraine Lock, in the role of designer liaison this year, who was sitting to my left, right next to her husband, head MAFW honcho Simon Lock. Let's call them L1 and L2.

Glancing over at her IMG colleague Josh Flinn who was seated next to the drag queens, L2 suddenly remembered a fascinating morsel of Flinn bio
trivia.

"You know he's B2 don't you?" she said.

"I don't understand," I replied, believing that she may be referring to a vitamin deficiency.

"He's B2 - Bananas in Pyjamas - that's his other job," she said.

I scribble a "B2??" in large letters on my notepad and hold it up in front of me like a scorecard for Flinn to see. I cross my fingers that the drag queens don't jump to the erroneous conclusion that I am rating their outfits.

Flinn spots it and furiously gesticulates the figure "1" with his index finger.

After the show I headed over to talk to him.

Although I did not get to personally examine Flinn's ABC contract, he assures me that he has had one for the past four years. The contract precludes him, he tells me, from being photographed with the BIP suit.

Flinn is not, as it emerged, the B1 who appears on television, but the public face of B1 and who makes all B1's public appearances around NSW. But frankly, given that there's only a 7 foot banana suit between them, who cares?

It was the perfect end to a week peppered with clowns, contortionists and cash grabs, bubble hems, hula hoop artistes and helium balloons. Not to mention the perfect conclusion to an era which has spanned 11 years and which has generated countless headlines and page three girly shots, and during which innumerable dummies have been spat across the runway and copious volumes of hair wrenched out. It's no coincidence that both Simon Lock and Tony Assness are bald.

But there you have it, what you have perhaps long suspected but just
couldn't quite put your finger on: at the core of MAFW lurks a Banana in Pyjamas.

Overwhelmed by my discovery, I conduct an exclusive interview on the spot:-

HAVE YOU EVER TURNED UP FOR WORK IN YOUR B1 SUIT?
Flinn: Sometimes I wish I had because the pants are extremely comfortable and they're very fashion-forward.

HOW DO YOU WASH THE COSTUME?
Flinn: We don't. We have people who wash it in a special centre. There are people who make the suit and fix the suit. It's 7 foot 6 inches.

ARE THERE ANY B1 SKILLS THAT HAVE COME IN HANDY AT FASHION WEEK?
Flinn: Yes, after you have had 700 children begging for your attention, it's very, very easy when you're looking to seat a collection show and you have exactly the same number of people screaming for your attention.

HAVE YOU EVER HAD TO REVERT TO ANY B1 MOVES DURING FASHION WEEK?
Flinn: Jump up and down and clap my hands? I wish. You get a lot more
respect when you're 7 foot 6 inches.

IS THERE ANY TRUTH TO THE RUMOUR THAT SIMON LOCK IS ACTUALLY B2?
Flinn: I wish - we'd be a great team.

BUT HE WOULDN'T WANT TO BE B2 SURELY, HE WOULD WANT TO BE TOP BANANA?
Flinn: Oh definitely, I think I'd have to relegate myself to being B2.



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